OPTIMUS

our family is growing! beau and i keep adding rescue dogs and vicious cats to our number...the newest addition: optimus. he is a 75 lb. beast of a guy - half pitbull half lab. he looks pitbull in the body and head but has huge feet, webbed toes, and a very chill disposition. he and izzy get along very well and are figuring out their relationship to each other and their beds, toys, and food. izzy is loving having someone to play with...that makes me happy. and this guy...he is more lovey than izzy (if that were possible)...
heres to a growing family and to hoping that when we decide to start having babies we don't get this carried away!

BUTTER MELTS OUT OF HABIT

i have walked through the valley of the shadow of death for much of the year. i cannot think of a time when someone was not dead or dying in the last 9 months. it is just now that the smoke is beginning to clear and i am left to grapple with this overdose of mortality.
yesterday, for example, we went to the birthday party of our friend david's daughter, alaina. she is four. beau has been with her for every birthday (even her first unofficial birthday of the day she was born) and i have been with her since her 1st birthday. her birthday was largely the same as it always is. it was in the same backyard that it always is...it was hot just like it always is smack in the center of july...there were drinks and snacks and sugary cake just like there always is...but something was not quite right - david was conspicuously absent. his absence felt more profound than his precence would have if he were there...
but if i closed my eyes i could imagine him behind me, holding baby tia, and talking to beau about going to see the new batman movie...i kept thinking, just a year ago he was right here...in that picture we have on our fridge he was here...
death is a strange, strange thief.