Friday, September 01, 2006

a witness

Marriage is crazy. No one ever says that....they smile with something like knowing in their eyes and say, "Are you excited? How wonderful..." (or some variation thereof). They never say that no matter how much you thought you knew this one that you have joined your life with, there WILL be things that are a suprise. Not awful suprises - just that Beau was a hairy baby....these kinds of suprises. At least he doesn't scare me anymore. I was so used to living alone in this place that when all of a sudden there was another body around - in the kitchen, in the bathroom - it freaked me out!
Marriage is crazy...but the most beautiful crazy I have ever experienced. The thing that has been the biggest blessing to me lately is the thought that I do not have to experience my life alone. Although I have loving family and friends who have supported me and listened to me - it is not THEIR life...but when you join your life in marriage to another - in this covenant - their life becomes connected to yours, and yours connected to theirs. Not in a losing identity sort of way but an illuminating of identity kind of way...I cannot hide from Beau - he is a witness to who I am and what I go through as I am for him. The thought that I have a witness - of the crazy things our neighbors do, the misadventures at church, the first ride on our brand new bikes - amazes me. I think one of the deepest human needs is to just simply be seen and heard - acknowledged.
I have to be honest, I did not fully know what I was getting myself into with this marriage business (I probably still don't)....but I am so thankful to have a witness and partner to walk beside on this journey.

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